December 13, 2011

escape

I used to sit in my closet for hours when I was younger to escape my enviroment. I would usually fall asleep crying, after being comforted by the dark, cozy closet. Why do I do that?

I crawled into my closet just a few months ago. I sat, curled up leaning against my shoes and on the phone with my mom. It was my attempt at escaping my circumstances. Shame, guilt, fear and sadness all drive me to my "escape". I guess that it's pretty common to want to escape when life gets uncomfortable.

Life is uncomfortable. And my closet is full of dirty laundry. Maybe it's time not to give in to my usual escape and face my circumstance head on.

I opened Psalm 130 and read:

Out of the depths I cry to you, O LORD;
O Lord, hear my voice.
Let your ears be attentive
to my cry for mercy.

If you, O LORD, kept a record of sins,
O Lord, who could stand?
But with you there is forgiveness;
therefore you are feared.

I wait for the LORD, my soul waits,
and in his word I put my hope.
My soul waits for the Lord
more than watchmen wait for the morning,
more than watchmen wait for the morning.

O Israel, put your hope in the LORD,
for with the LORD is unfailing love
and with him is full redemption.
He himself will redeem Israel
from all their sins.

I'll trade my escape, for His word.

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