January 1, 2011

The truth is,

2010 was a really hard year for me. I grew a lot as a person, consequently this growth came with pains instigated by the many remnants of my mistakes. Thinking back on 2010 brings the most uncomfortable thoughts to mind. Major events, mistakes and words exchanged, all reveal the very real depravity of my heart. Honestly, there are times that I literally bury my face in my hands out of embarrassment, shame, confusion, bitterness...

2010 was an uncomfortable year and has proved, I am nothing with out God. I can remember having specific conversations with God before loosing myself to what seemed harmless. There was one conversation that I literally told God that I didn't care if it was wrong or if a friend tried to convince me it was foolish, "I'm going"...I ended the conversation rationalizing and justifying to excuse my actions . I listened to fools and believed they had more to offer then whatever God may of had in store. I regretted everything I did, said and saw. There came a point when I couldn't handle living with myself anymore. I shut people out, lost friendships and spent the first half of my summer believing there was nothing beautiful in this World, including me.

With all the immediate pain that weighs my heart down when reverting back to this past year, there is a soft, peaceful hum that blankets over every single heart-wrenching mistake I made. Our true Mastercrafter has been perfecting me through thick and thin this whole year.

And I've never seen anything more beautiful in this World, then the redemptive fingerprints of my loving Savior implemented in my own life and many others.

So if there is one thing I can take away from this past year and bring into 2011, it's this undeniable, infectious, infinite love that has changed me and taught me that it doesn't matter how hurtful, rude, impatient, angry, rebellious, degrading, annoying or wrong a person may be because they matter.

2011 Resolution: Treat people like they matter.

1 comment:

Kate said...

Favorite resolution i've ever heard. Love this. Love you.